Hitting The Wall I Built...

I have wanted to start a blog about my weight lose journey for some time now.  I guess now is a good a time as any! I want to daily encourage anyone who wants to lose weight but doesn't know where to start and anyone who is currently doing it and just needs a partner in crime!  With that being all I have to say about that, here we go!

Allow Me To Explain

I (finally) started this crazy ride called Lose Weight on December 29th 2011.  That was the day after my 27th birthday. (I wanted to enjoy the birthday cake my hubby made first.)  I was so tired of every year saying I was going to lose weight, then the following year seeing pictures of me HUGE and thinking, "another year wasted".  I have gained 10 pounds every year since graduating high school.  How big was I going to get??!!  The final straw for me was going to the Goodwill to buy pants because yet again, my current clothes were getting too tight.  I had gotten up to a size 22 and was in the dressing room actually trying on 24's!!  I looked at myself in the mirror and said, "ENOUGH IS ENOUGH!!"  I'm sure I scared the lady next to me.  I left the clothes in the room and left the store so pissed at myself. How could I have let this happen??  How could I not care about myself so much??  It's pretty easy to do when you keep all your mirrors up to chest level and avoid store windows and full length mirrors.  It's easy to pretend you're not big.  It's easy to doll up your face and look cute from the neck up. It's easier to just be funny and sweet and hope no one notices your belly roll.   I needed to change, I wanted to change, and I decided to give Weight Watchers another shot.

 

 

 

 

Bringing My Friends Along For "The Ride"

From the beginning, I blasted about my efforts to lose weight on Facebook.  I wanted to have that support and accountability.  I knew if I said it out loud, I would have to make it happen.  I knew that if I said I was going to do it, then I would HAVE to do it or I would just be publicly humiliating myself when I failed. I DID NOT want to fail (again).  I have tried this before many, many times and gave up and gained even more every time.  (You know that song and dance).  I cannot tell you what a great idea putting it on Facebook  was!!  I have been so encouraged and blessed by so many people cheering me on, giving me advice and actually ASKING ME for advice!!  Yeah, I brag about my successes!   t feels good to get the positive feedback, but also, I am proving that it CAN be done.  Anyone can lose weight.  You don't have to be rich, smart, perfect, etc.  You just have to want it and DO IT! I hope that I have proven that to at least one person. 

 

 

Jumping To Now

So it's been exactly 246 days , OR 35 weeks, OR 8 months, however you want to put it. Regardless, it has been a doozy of a ride. Lots of ups, downs, spins, loopty-loops, and free falls! Now I have a new upgrade to the "ride" called a wall, and I am hitting it HARD! The sad thing is I am the one building this wall. I have been stuck at 168 for quite awhile. (1 month, which is a LONG time for me!) I have been losing inches but not very quickly either. Basically I am not making much progress lately. The reason being: fast food, binging, periodical "skip days" and too many "cheat days". It is too far along in this journey for me to be letting go like this. It's scary to think that this could be as far as I get and even scarier to think I may go back to 220 lbs! (Yikes!)

Here Come The Excuses...

I think the main reason I am losing focus is I'm focusing on too many things.  I switched from Weight Watchers to a low carb/high protein diet, to ditching both of those and trying to just eat "clean".  As far as fitness; I was just concerned with moving more, then earning Activity Points (a Weight Watchers term which means points earn that can be swapped for food), to weight lifting  to get "fit".  For someone like me, this all just makes my head spin and I got make some S'mores.  I have slowly been spinning out of control. I need structure for this to work!

 

"It's A New Day"

Today is the first day I have been back in the driver's seat.  I have been tracking today (Weight Watchers method) and so far so good.  Maybe I do need to stay on it awhile longer.  I am FORCING myself to go weigh-in tonight and actually stay for the meeting, so hopefully I'll get my head straight.  I'll let ya know how it goes.  :)